Coronavirus Courage

“The LORD thunders
at the head of his army;
his forces are beyond number,
and mighty is the army that obeys his command. The day of the LORD is great” – Joel 2:11

Our country and NJ state are in week 6 of social distancing. Our women’s prayer group has been praying together through free conference calls every afternoon Monday to Friday. We are also on week six in praying.

It has been hard on me to be leading these prayers because of my fears, doubts and vain imaginations that intrude my mind. When we pray as intercessors, we hear from the Holy Spirit what we are to pray together about. My problem is that after praying on these matters, I wring my hands with worry. Because I know too much. I’m holding onto these concerns rather than letting them go. Holy Spirit, please forgive me and please help me. I need your power and mercy. I want to be like an eagle rather than a chicken. 🙏 Please help me.

Lately I’ve been trying to encourage myself as I used to do when leading the women’s intercessory prayer group at my church. Many times especially in the first year I wanted to abandon my post. It was really hard. The enemy does not like corporate intercessory prayers. Therefore I concluded that this prayer work must be very important, powerful and effective as James 5:16 said.

This coronavirus pandemic is exposing all kinds of fears and doubts deep within me. In the first week, I feared dying before seeing my children and many family members being saved. Now I have made peace that this is okay. God has heard my many prayers for their salvation and I will trust in Him.

Another fear that is surfacing up is how would I die. Will it be a painful and long process? I am still wrestling with this one, asking for God’s peace that surpasses all understanding. Psalm 139 comes to mind. I find comfort in the psalmist words as I relate to his heart and experience.

It’s interesting to see that my earliest questions when I was leading the first year, are surfacing up again. Such as do our prayers really do much of anything? Is our combined faith big enough (at least a mustard seed size) to move a mountain, a hill? Oh how much my faith has shriveled in this coronavirus pandemic! O Lord, please help us I pray and have mercy. 🙏

This afternoon it’s suppose to thunder and rain. Thunder reminds me of God. Like He is coming to rescue us, His children. I hope it thunders a lot. Thunderstorms strangely comfort me because it’s a tangible way to feel that God is near.

Another fear that I’m in the process of overcoming is the fear of rejection by men. Well, the Holy Spirit has been making it easy for me to overcome this fear. Thank you Jesus. Whenever I go out to the supermarket I’d bring spiritual resources to give to the store workers. Right now everyone is so afraid. They are craving the comfort of God and His word. Yesterday at Wegmans, I gave to a lady stocking produce, 10 printouts of bible verses on comfort and courage and asked her to distribute to her family and friends. She looked at them and really thanked me. Praise God.

I hesitated naming this blog “Coronavirus Courage” but the Holy Spirit is telling me to name it this. I would’ve named it more like “coronavirus dread”. Haha. Then again throughout the Bible, God’s messengers always call out to His people the things that are to become, not as they are now. Lord, may your people come out of this coronavirus pandemic with courage, boldness, humility and great love for You and one another. May we become a great army that obeys your command no matter the cost and sacrifice. May we stay in our post and never abandon our position until you reassign us, or take us home whenever and however. Holy Spirit, please empower your people with coronavirus courage. In Jesus’s name, I pray amen.

(Btw, I think it’s a lot easier to be “doing” things than to be praying. Because for me it requires greater faith and trust in Jesus.)

James 5:16b (AMP)

The heartfelt and persistent prayer of a righteous man (believer) can accomplish much [when put into action and made effective by God—it is dynamic and can have tremendous power].

“The one concern of the devil is to keep Christians from praying. He fears nothing from prayerless studies, prayerless work, and prayer-less religion. He laughs at our toil, mocks at our wisdom, but trembles when we pray.” – Samuel Chadwick

4/24/20 – I realized now that I was spiritually attacked by the enemy from Sunday to Tuesday morning. Because my mind was confused, constantly bombarded with thoughts of fear, doubt and dread. It’s so important to daily pray, read the Bible and have fellowship with believers no matter how you feel. I would’ve asked for prayers if this confusion persisted. I found relief and comfort in coloring and writing this blog!

Thank you Holy Spirit for helping me even when I didn’t know what was happening to me to pray for help. 🙏