I’m reading an autobiography of a women who had an eating disorder for a long time. Her book is called “Brain Over Binge”. After many years of getting therapy and treatment without any improvement; suddenly one chance reading of a book meant for alcohol/drug addiction freed her completely. It is really remarkable how it happened. Her story brought to memory my similar experiences in finding freedom from the terrible voices in my head. Both of us stopped the voices from ruining our lives and we both did it without another human support and without God’s direct intervention.

Of course God is the source of our discoveries on how to stop the voices in our heads. It was much simpler than today’s human psychology is teaching and implementing. In her case, these terrible thoughts or voices in her head were encouraging her to binge and then after, a terrible barrage of guilt and shame would led her to purge herself through a full day of work out at the gym. She wasn’t able to throw up her food and so she’d work out at the gym for 7-8 hours the next day. It was impossible for her to maintain a good life and relationships with such a demanding cycle of binging and purging. Her body was falling apart from the incredible demands on her body too.

One day right before she was going to the gym to work out after binging the day before, she went into a bookstore and found herself in the aisle for self-help books on alcohol/drug addiction. One book intrigued her and so she bought it and read it almost entirely that day in the gym. The book is called, “Rational Recovery” by Jack Trimpey.

She realized that her eating disorder didn’t happen because of some distressing situation or dysfunction in relationships. Perhaps for others it had, but she was from a good decent family. She wrote that traditional therapy and treatment were going about it the wrong way. Yes these issues and relational dysfunctions were there and need to be addressed and talked about, but these issues did not cause the eating disorder. Instead her brain that has been damaged and deprived of nutrients leading to her addiction of food binging. Her lower or animal brain took over her thinking and caused her to eat enormous amounts of food for survival. She went on to explain the sciences and medical reports to support this theory. She didn’t talk about religion so I’m assuming she is an atheist or agnostic and wasn’t raised with any faith.

She decided after reading this RR book to stop listening and obeying these animalistic loud voices in her mind, which is the lower brain taking over. Soon after, one night alone is her apartment the terrible voices started to speak again, encouraging her to binge and that she deserves it, etc. As she resisted the voices, they became louder and louder. She continued to resist the voices, using her higher brain to help her reason that it’s her lower brain shouting and to not obey these voices. She allowed the voices to shout to her as loudly as they wanted and then suddenly the voices stopped. When she looked at the clock, only half an hour passed. The voices did not come back again that night and she had no desire to binge that night. There were few occasions of binging and purging but as her mind improved with proper nutrition, and realizing that she didn’t have to obey these voices, the voices no longer had a hold on her. One day soon after, the voices stopped completely and she was free from the eating disorder. After a few years of being set free, she wanted to help others and so she wrote her book.

As I was reading about her experiences of being set free from these terrible voices, it brought to memory my own experiences hearing voices in my head too. Except mine wasn’t caused by lack of nutrition. It was caused by playing a ouija board game. This game was passed along secretly to me by a friend at church in my high school group. After a week of playing this game with my sister, the terrible thoughts started and I assumed they were my thoughts. I have no doubt that playing with the ouija board game opened up a demonic portal into my life.

Since the church is not ready to help deliver people like her or me, it’s God’s mercies providing methods and techniques of freedom from the demonic voices from ruining our lives any further.

As I was reflecting on her story and triumph over eating disorder; it made me think about my triumph over silencing these terrible voices in my head. Like her, I also did it on my own. I would have received help from therapists but my family didn’t have health insurance or extra money for such services back then. Also in the late 80s, mental health problems were seen as a big taboo and hidden away, especially in Asian community.

I think it’s time for me to dig into my memories buried and not spoken about, and start processing these experiences in order to help others just like this brave lady did by writing her book. This is one way to defeat the enemy. “And they have conquered him by the blood of the Lamb and by the word of their testimony, for they loved not their lives even unto death.” – Revelation 12:11

Ouija board games, tarot cards, mediums, fortune tellers, psychics, séances, etc are all readily available and acceptable in our culture today. They are no longer secretly shared and tabooed like in the 80s. As servants of the Lord Jesus have used the internet to reach the unreached; so have the servants of Satan.

As for my Alex’s deliverance and salvation, last night in my moment of panic and fear; I remembered this verse. Thank you Holy Spirit. Please help me today to fight the good fight for my faith.

Don’t run from tests and hardships, brothers and sisters. As difficult as they are, you will ultimately find joy in them; if you embrace them, your faith will blossom under pressure and teach you true patience as you endure. And true patience brought on by endurance will equip you to complete the long journey and cross the finish line—mature, complete, and wanting nothing. – James 1:2-4 (VOICE)

John 10:25-30 – Jesus answered, “I did tell you, but you do not believe. The works I do in my Father’s name testify about me, but you do not believe because you are not my sheep. My sheep listen to my voice; I know them, and they follow me.I give them eternal life, and they shall never perish; no one will snatch them out of my hand. My Father, who has given them to me, is greater than all; no one can snatch them out of my Father’s hand. I and the Father are one.”